


The Lost Ones Weeping

by MontyPink



Series: Shod & The Age of Resistance [4]
Category: The Dark Crystal (1982), The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance (TV)
Genre: Other, Post AOR
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:13:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25772638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MontyPink/pseuds/MontyPink
Summary: After being send away by Maudra Mera, Shod stumbles upon real treasure.
Relationships: skekShod/skekZok (Dark Crystal)
Series: Shod & The Age of Resistance [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1861855
Comments: 4
Kudos: 7





	The Lost Ones Weeping

There is a lot the Skeksis Lords never told the other creatures of Thra. Some were truths they rather kept hidden because it would change how they would view them. They were perfectly fine being seen as Lords and above them. One of the things they never told them was how they had to learn positive feelings. Hatred came natural, as did jealousy, spite and anger. But love, warmth and compassion were things that were alien to them and as soon as they started to feel these things they got confused, scared even. So many hide away when they feel these feelings, hoping they'll pass. The Palace may not have walls, but their hearts certainly did. There is no reason to let anyone get so close to you. What if they learn an uncomfortable truth about you? What if they see the real you and hate it. Or worse.. what if they see the real you and love you unconditionally?

SkekShod always saw himself as the lucky one, all things considered. He freely experienced love two times. He let it happen. While he could never explain the feeling he always found it warm and welcoming. The first time was with Zok, how he took care of Shod when the others pretended he didn't even exist. How he showed patience when Shod had trouble talking and made sure he was fed and clothed. How he went out of his way to find a job Shod could do, freely and unafraid. The small things he did when The Emperor was near to make sure Shod was comfortable and happy. Shod bathed in that warmth and he felt like part of him was missing when he moved to Sami Thicket, away from his Ritual-Master for so long but being all the more happier when he did visit. Just the two of them, hidden from the worth and it's misery.

The second time was when he allowed himself to be part of the gelfling and their rituals and lifestyle. The warmth he felt when dining with them, when he befriended the Maudra and her childings for generations. The joy he felt when he saw the childing he helped take care of grow into adults. He remembered how the gelfling would admit that they loved him. Not because they had to, but because they wanted to. He was their lord and he was proud of that. 

But with love comes heartbreak and what broke his heart in this very moment was that he never told them he was proud of that. Or how he loved them back. Not the way he loved Zok, but it was still love. He spend many days and many nights thinking about how he felt and the conclusion was love. The same love a parent must feel for their childling, he figured. He should ask Mera about-

Shod cut his own thought short. 

Mera..

He wasn't able to ask her anymore. Just a few hours ago she had send him away with nothing but some food and some shiny objects that he liked. She even put in one of her own items; a necklace made by her own mother. A prized item that she never took off, yet she had given it to Shod. 

Shod closed his eyes and tried to remember her face. It was only a few hours ago that he saw her but it was already becoming vague. The throbbing feeling in his heart certainly didn't help. He wanted nothing more but to turn back and demand to stay but he knew that that wasn't possible. He still had no idea what was going on but perhaps Zok could make sense of it. All he had to do was go to the castle, ask Zok what was going on. He would explain it, calmly and soft like he always did and then he could go back. Tell Mera what Zok would tell him and then all will be the same again.. better even! 

The pain in his heart subdued a little and he moved on with renewed energy. He didn't care for the leaves and twigs that stuck to his hair and clothes, nor did he care for the blisters and pain in his feet. Shod wondered if there ever was a Skeksis who walked this far. He knew that the others in the castle liked being driven around in carriages. Except maybe... 

He paused and looked around like a skittish fizzig. 

SkekMal.

Shod had not considered him. 

What if he ran into him? What would he do? Would he even know it was Mal? Probably not. 

Would Mal know it was him? 

He moved towards a small creek and checked his reflection, a thing he rarely did. Most of the objects he collected reflected but he tried to make effort of not catching his own reflection. Seeing himself was a reminder of what happened. Even now his own appearance shocked him.

He looked so worn. So thin.

\- CRACK -

A loud sound spooked him and he made himself small. Out of instinct he grabbed his head and curled up. Thra was rich with creatures but he remembered Mera and someone else... who was it... No matter. Talk about the creatures of Thra being sick. If they were to attack him he surely would be done for. He trembled, he shook.. Then suddenly he heard Zok's voice loud and clear in his mind.

"You are a lord of the crystal, Shod. No matter what anyone says. I know this to be true." 

He remembered those words well. Zok had come rather unexpected bearing gifts. Shiny items mostly found with the Sifa clan. For a moment he had wondered why Zok had business with the seafarers but he didn't care. The gift was pretty and more importantly just for him. Zok spoke about how Tek lost his eye by his hands and while he spoke with pride, Shod didn't mind. Punishment was part of the game the skeksis played daily. Did he not know that too well? He knew Zok to punish and only punish. Never did he hurt others more than was deemed required.

Then suddenly he remembered Mera's words to him; Don't talk to anyone.

The voices argued in his head but finally Zok's won. Shod stood up straight and dusted himself off.

"W-who goes t-there?"

No reaction. 

"I h-heard you!" Oh how he wished he sounded more confident. Not even a childing would be threatened by his voice. Yet there was a response this time.

"It's best that you stay away." 

Shod looked around and squinted then he noticed the source of the voice and the sounds; a gelfling. His mind was working overtime. Grottan maybe? He thought Grottan was the correct term. He learned with the childlings back in Sami Thicket... Grottans had big eyes... and her eyes were certainly big. But she didn't look that healthy. If Shod was shocked by his own appearance he was appalled by hers. 

Her skin was covered in deep purple veins that seemed to glow. Her eyes looked sad but yet they seemed to hide the entire universe in them. Both Mera's and Zok's words of advice disspeared like snow in the sun and curiosity got the better of him.

Without thinking he got closer, barely noticing the decaying and dead around him. It seemed like all this gelfling touched died or got sick.

"STAY AWAY, SKEKSIS!" 

The loud voice made him flinch but he swallowed and tried to not let the other notice his fear. 

"I.. My name is Ssssssshod. W-what is yours?" He craved someone to talk to, anyone. Even if it was this curious creature. "I don't r-really get out m-much.." Shod looked around him. "And... " He continued softly. "I'm l-lost..." Not a lie. He really was lost. 

The pair kept their eyes on each other. Sensing a form of familiarity within each other. 

She looked at him and thought about what had happened moments earlier. Her redirecting the power of the darkening, killing one of his kind. How the Hunter had died moments before. She thought about Rian and how he wanted to follow her but she didn't let him. Her days crossed her mind.. her young brother. How she had become to despise the skeksis, a feeling she wasn't familiar with. Yet this one seemed.. different. He wasn't yelling, he wasn't loud. He genuinely seemed lost. The way he stood there, his tail curled a little around him and with fumbling hands reminded her of herself just a few days ago when she left the caves. Lost and confused about what was going on.

He looked at her and thought about how alone she looked and how different. Something.. someone did this to her and she looked so broken. He thought about himself when So had struck him and how alone he felt. She seemed different than the gelfling at Sami Thicket, but the way she stood there he could tell that she was like them; kind and welcoming. 

Suddenly an idea. 

"D.. Do you want to e-eat?" He patted himself down till he found Mira's pack. "A h-hungry gelfling issss no g-good." Shod reached in the pack, found some food and threw it at her. It hit her chest and landed on the ground with a thud. It took a little too long for him to realise how rude he must look right now but before the other could apologise the small gelfling let out a sound Shod always liked to hear; laughter. 

He bowed his head a little and reached to grab the food he threw but she dismissed him with a handwave and moved to pick it up herself. 

"Deet." She said softly and when she noticed his cocked head she added. "My name, you asked for it earlier." 

His eyes lit up and he nodded. "Ssssssshod!" 

"Nice to meet you, Shod." 

"G-good to meet you t-too... G-g-gelfling Deet.." 

Shod watched as she unpacked the food and ate it. She didn't offer him anything but he didn't really care. He was too distracted by her glowing eyes, wanting nothing more than to see them up close. 

"Are you alone?" Deet asked after a while.

A nod. "I'm.. h-heading to the castle to talk t-to the otherssss. I was ssssssend by M-Maudra M-Mera." 

She looked at him again, two species on different sides of the war and yet so the same. If this was a another age, another time, perhaps they could've been friends. While still a skeksis he at least tried to respect her. He gave her food and he was still sheepishly standing still in the same place as before. At least he listened to the order of staying away. A ghost of a smile appeared on her face. 

"What are you going to say to them once you get there."

He hadn't thought about that in the slightest. "I'm n-not sssssssure.." 

"Will they even listen?"

His silence awoke something in her. Not anger, she had carried that feeling for a while now, but sadness. The events of the past few days played in her head. Hup, Rian, Brea, Seladon... the skeksis, the heretic, the wanderer.. All the deaths and so little victory. Rian and her own triumph over the arathim and how she managed to see her family again. Fleeting moments of hope, gone just like that. Deet didn't want to cry in front of a skeksis, especially not now but she couldn't help it. Her tears burned and she wasn't sure if it was because of her new condition or because she finally let her emotions out. She weeped and wailed without caring that he was there, saying the names of her family and new friends between sobs. 

Shod eyes became big and he filled his cheeks with air. He never really knew what to do with crying. Sure he had done it many times himself but when others did it was a whole different thing. He gently reached out and balled his hand into a fist soo his nails wouldn't hurt her and tapped her shoulder which she shook off.

He looked around then got an idea. Shod reached into his pockets and put some stones on the ground before her. Deet looked at it but kept weeping. 

Okay so bribing her to stop crying didn't' work. Perhaps Mera had packed him something that might help. Sweet Mera and her black hair.. he was fairly certain she had black hair anyway. He kept her in the corner of his eye and looked through the pack and felt a wave of heartbreak come over himself when he saw what he gave her; a book, deep hidden away in the pack. Meant for childlings to learn about the other clans and the fauna and flora of Thra. It was written in a simple manner and he loved reading it and learning from it. Shod bounced a little on his feet as he flipped through pages. 

He tapped her shoulder again and then pointed to the stones on the ground and then at the book, showing her a page. "SSSSSSSSifa! Ssssssseafarers!" He nodded then reached into his pocket again, finding an item once belonging to the Dousan, known for their gold and blue. 

Deet stopped crying and looked at the weird skeksis before her. Her eyes looked past him, trying to figure out if he was truly alone or if this was a sick form of a joke but he bend over to look at her in her eyes. "D-dousan... think d-d-d-death is okay!" 

Then he pointed at her, the tip of his nail gently touching her nose. "G...Grottan... C-caves.." He spoke more but his words didn't reach her. He didn't seem to be affected by her condition at all. For the first time since they met she got a good look at him. He seemed weak and thin and his face was covered with boils. His white hair was covered in twigs and leaves but she could make out a small dent under it. 

"..... and then... D-drenchen... h-have muskis..." He had stars in his eyes as he spoke, pointing at a picture of a slim creature, which she was fairly certain she had seen Naia with. "Ha'ar... h-has a fountain.. muskis live t-there too!"

His enthusiasm sure was infections for just this moment she forgot about all that happened, even if he was a skeksis and thus the enemy he was a pleasant distraction.

"Shod." Her voice made him perk up even more. "Do you have something about Nurloc in that book of yours?" He smiled at her, revealing a sharp row of teeth but it didn't make her scared, as he flipped through the pages, then like a childling he turned the book around, showing a drawing. 

She giggled. "Did you know my outfit is made from their butt?" 

Shod grimaced a bit, finding that fact more disturbing than her looks. But he had reached his goal, she had stopped crying and was now laughing, not at him but with him. That is how they stood there for a while, laughing and smiling like two old friends meeting each other after a long time apart. When night time came Deet made a fire and they both stayed around it. Both forgetting their troubles for a bit. 

Deet learned that Shod lived in Sami Thicket with the Spriton for thrines now. How he befriended the Maudra for generations and how he knew Kylan, though he was unable to tell her what he looked like. His favorite food were once that tasted sweet and he once had glowmoss stuck in his hair for a while. He was good friend with Maudra Mera and liked learning and shiny things. 

In turn he learned that Deet was Grottan, has two fathers and a brother. That she liked taking care of Nurloc and that she came to the surface to talk to the All Maudra. He learned she had befriended a podling named Hup. When she said that he felt a tingle of familiarity but he didn't say anything about it. 

The fire was dimming but neither was tired after a few moments of silence Deet spoke.

"Do you know why Mera send you away, Shod?" 

He shook his head. That was another fact Deet learned about Shod; talking was hard so she mostly asked yes or no questions so he could shake or nod his head. 

"Whatever the reason, you must be excited to return to your family at the castle." 

"M-Mera... M-Mera is family." It was out before he knew it and then, like someone had opened the gates it all came out. In stutters and sputters but he couldn't keep silent anymore. He told her, without thinking about the consequences, about how he hated So. How he still thought he was an unfit ruler. How he disliked the others, except Zok, for not doing anything while he was hurting. How none of them even cared to look at him or even acknowledged he existed. Shod didn't even realise it but now his own tears were flowing. He wanted to go back to Mera and the Spriton. They were his home, not the skeksis. The skeksis treated him worse than they did podlings and Zok told him various times that they treat podlings rather bad and he would be wise to do the same. But he didn't want to do the same. He didn't want to hurt people just because. It felt him with pain and agony. 

After his rant his head felt heavy and he felt dizzy. The long healed wound on his head was pounding and he put his hand on it to calm it down. He didn't even realise his companion was still there until she put his hand on his. It was small but still looked stronger than Shod's own frail hand. 

"You can pick your own family." She told him and gently patted his hand. He so yearned for that love, that tenderness and put his other hand on hers. "You don't have to go back."

Shod shook his head and whispered. "I h-have to.." He stared at the dying flames before them. "I p-promised.. Mera.. I w-would." His gaze traveled from the fire to her. "Ssssskeksis did this to y-you..." It wasn't a question, more a statement. He knew them to be selfish and a brute, but he would have never imagined that would extent to gelfling as well. Deet said nothing which was enough for Shod. The thought that Zok may have something to do with this made him feel sick. 

"Sssssscientist... is sssssssmart. I'll talk to h-him for you." He spoke while he kept looking at their hands. "We can f-fix this." He added though it was barely above a whisper. 

Deet heart fell. Had she met him days earlier this would have been a wonderful meeting but now it was bitter. Should she tell him? About Rian and Mira? About the dual glaive and how she was responsible for the death of his kind. Would he be angry? Would he be joyful?

"The Skeksis in the castle... are draining the gelfling." Her voice was hoarse and when she dared to look at him he didn't looked as shocked as she thought he would have. He looked sad and broken. Suddenly it made sense why Mera send him away. She was scared that he might hurt her. Even though he would never but if he was a gelfling, he'd do the same. He did not blame her or resent her at all. In fact he felt guilty he wasn't able to do more. But hope was not lost, he had Deet now. And he could help her and with her Mera and then he could show them all that he was worthy. Perhaps the only true lord of the crystal because only he could decide who he was and he decided, in this very moment that he wanted to be good and helpful and truly worthy of the gelfling's love. 

"I... I will t-try to ssssstop them." He wished he spoke more clearer, but his passion was there. 

"Will they hear you?'

"it's w-worth a sssssshot." 

They both sat there, her hand folded in his, in silence, watching as the last spark of the fire died. 

Deet looked up at the stars and Shod watched how they were reflected in her eyes. 

"Things w-will be the sssssame again." He said softly.

She blinked and looked at him with a smile. "No. They will be better."

**Author's Note:**

> This is still within the canon timeline so this is going to bite me in the ass eventually.


End file.
